What is Engaged Encounter?
What Engaged Encounter is not
When
and where?
What
is the cost?
What
to pack and wear
What happens at the weekends?
Why
should we attend?
Comments from marriage experts
Comments from couples who have attended an Engaged Encounter Weekend
Comment
from a couple already married for a year
What is an Engaged Encounter?
Engaged Encounter - United Methodist is a weekend experience designed to help couples prepare personally and as a couple for marriage. The focus is on the marriage, not on the wedding. "A wedding is a day ... a marriage is a lifetime."
Couples are shown communication and decision-making techniques they can use throughout
their lifetime together. Engaged Encounter is specifically designed for quiet reflection
and discussion by each couple. It is a positive, simple, common-sense experience between
two people who are either seriously considering engagement, engaged or recently married.
At no time will the couple be asked to share their private experiences with the group.
What an Engaged Encounter is
not:
It is not: -a lecture series -a group sharing experience -a Bible study -or a vacation
weekend. Who should attend? Although the Engaged Encounter is United Methodist in
orientation, it is open to couples of any faith. Any couple serious about making and
keeping their marriage the best it can be will discover the weekend to be meaningful and
non-threatening and will be able to relate the weekend concepts to their own faith. This
includes couples of all ages and those who have been married before. Couples without
church affiliation are also welcome.
When and where?
Engaged Encounter weekends are held several times during the year, at various locations
throughout the country. The program begins on Friday evening at 7:30 p.m. and ends Sunday
afternoon about 4:30 p.m. Of course the total weekend stay is essential to experience the
full benefit. Register early to be assured a space. Contact the persons listed below for
weekend dates.
What is the cost?
A non-refundable deposit, usually between $35 and $75 sent with the registration form
will hold a reservation for you. The total weekend cost, including the deposit, is usually
between $175 and $300 per couple, depending on facilities costs in the area. The balance,
which covers rooms for two nights and meals, is due on arrival at the weekend. Please make
your check payable to Engaged Encounter - United Methodist.
What to pack and wear:
Separate sleeping facilities are provided for men and women on the weekend. Pack
separately and bring casual clothing that will be comfortable. Jeans, shorts and tennis
shoes are acceptable. Variations in air conditioning make it a good idea to bring sweaters
for indoors. Depending on the weather, part of the time may be spent outdoors as well, so
a jacket may be advisable. No formal gatherings require ties, coats or dresses.
What happens at the weekends?
The weekend is presented by three married couples -- all are United Methodist, one is
clergy. The presentations are given to the group as a whole. After each presentation, each
couple has private time for personal sharing with each other. A wide variety of subjects
are presented to give each couple freedom to explore the areas important to them. The
weekend unfolds differently for each couple, since each person brings a different
perspective to the relationship. By communicating their own fears, values and
expectations, couples gain deeper understanding of themselves as they prepare for the
covenant of marriage.
Why should we attend?
The weekend experience offers each couple the insights, the tools, and the confidence
to enrich their relationship and strengthen their love for one another. They learn that
good marriages don't just happen. They must be developed. For many couples, this weekend
is one of the most significant experiences of their courtship.
Comments from marriage
experts:
"Engaged Encounter is the best marriage preparation program in communication for
engaged couples of any denomination in the U.S." - Michael J McManus, author of the
book,"Marriage Savers", syndicated columnist in 100 newspapers, radio
commentator" "In addition to pre-marital counseling, another wonderful way to
eliminate the unpleasant surprises of early married life is a program called Engaged
Encounter ... I strongly recommend Engaged Encounter to every couple planning a
wedding." - Dr. James Dobson, author of "Love for a Lifetime", founder of
Focus on the Family.
Comments from couples who have
attended an Engaged Encounter Weekend:
"It seemed like it was just 'our' weekend. I found a new friend for life, my
fiancee." "It has been three years, but when I hear Engaged Encounter... I get a
warm feeling, a smile and recall it as the real beginning of our relationship."
"Friday night, we loved each other. Sunday night, we loved each other so much more...
and still do." "I felt apprehensive, but in just two days we learned more about
ourselves than in the 2 years of dating. I felt confidant." "We almost didn't
go. I really believe if we hadn't attended, we would have missed the greatest growth
opportunity of our life." "How can I describe before and after? How about
comparing glass to diamonds?... or optimism to total belief in him and of our love
relationship." "We dated for 5 years, so I didn't expect to really learn much
from the weekend. Boy was I surprised. There were still topics we had not really
discussed, and I found out we didn't always know how each other felt on every issue."
"We laughed, we cried, and we talked. (Oh yeah, we also argued a little.) Yet we
reached a level of closeness and communication that would have been very difficult to do
on our own. It was as if we were falling in love all over again."
Comment
from a couple already married for a year:
"Although we thought we had a very close and open relationship up until that weekend, we would not be where we are in our marriage without those 3 days. We were able to uncover our individual thoughts and expectations about our marriage in a very safe and supportive environment. It brought us closer together than we had ever been."
